what do you see?

I don't want to make any accusations, but we're starting to get a little annoyed at the *ahem* random customs checking on re-entering Japan...it's just a little strange that out of the hundreds of (mostly Japanese) people coming off a flight, we always seem to be singled out for luggage checks, all our careful practiced packing getting messed up in the process.

Actually, there is an amusing side to the checks in Japan - the Scrapbook. Every Japanese customs officer's best friend, this is an amazingly extensive but slightly homemade-looking directory of prohibited items that is invariably reached for after the usual small talk about jobs, how long we've stayed in Japan and so on. A typical exchange is something like:

officer: "Do you have any....swords?!" (flicks to swords page)
us: "Nope"
officer:"Mushrooms?!" (turns to pages of quite fascinating mushrooms, most of which we never knew existed).
us: "Of course not"
officer (getting desperate): "Pornography?!!" (whips open page of photocopied, censored naughty magazine covers)
us (suppressing sniggers): "None"

Yesterday, the officer in question seemed convinced we had either LSD or crystal-meth, as he lingered for a while over these pages, stabbing the pictures with a chubby finger and looking us with a wry, questioning smile.

I'm always tempted to play dumb and say loudly "No thanks, we're not interested!" but haven't summoned the nerve yet...